Sophie’s Yoda character study

At the age of 999,the ancient Jedi master,Yoda,is the most powerful person in galactic history.

His rough,wrinkly face shows kindness and determination.The scanty,green,plump mass of his body is covered by a brown cloak. Grey and white wisps of hair travel around his long,pointy ears.

Aided by the Force,Yoda can do things his body can’t do alone.He also uses an emerald green light sabre to fight,so he doesn’t run out of the Force.The Force assists him when he moves swiftly and leap long distances.

Explaining his feeling of calm,he has a hoarse voice.Smiling is something that Yoda doesn’t usually do,so it might explain why he always looks grumpy.

Yoda may be miniature but you shouldn’t underestimate him.He is more than you expect.

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6 thoughts on “Sophie’s Yoda character study

  1. Sophie,

    You have thought carefully about both your vocabulary and have worked hard to include complex sentence and even embedded clauses. Within your writing I can see complex and compound sentences with a simple sentence at the end to the piece and sum up your final thoughts. I think this is a very powerful final sentence.

    Be careful about falling into the trap of putting the subordinate clause first in all of your complex sentence – variety is everything. There are other ways to vary your sentence openers as well so you aren’t restricted to that. For example, instead of:

    ‘The scanty,green,plump mass of his body is covered by a brown cloak.’

    What about:

    ‘Scanty, green and plump the mass of his body is covered by a brown cloak.’

    Also, the word ‘scanty’ means to not have enough of something so your probably wouldn’t use it to discuss his height. You wouldn’t say someone didn’t have enough height, they are as tall as they are. What you could have said was ‘Scanty white tufts of hair still hung about his scalp and ears.’ If you wanted to use that word. Is this example we assume that he used to have more hair and that’s why he’s now ‘not got enough’. Does that make sense?

  2. Sophie,

    I really liked how you described that his rough, wrinkly face shows kindness and determination because it describes that he never gives up.

  3. Sophie,
    I love the way you said that Yodas body was scanty, green, plump mass of his body is covered by a brown cloak. I thought you could maybe explain the cloak a bit more, e.g. …is covered by a leathery, faded brown cloak.

  4. I like the way you described him carefully and had a new pharagrah for each discripsen. Maybe you could do each praragragraph longer

  5. I like some of the words you have used in your writing.
    Personally I think it is good to read, because its about star wars and Yoda is one of my best characters. I can’t think of any thing to change, it’s brill.

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